The Vietnam Swans’ former Prez, Daryl Taber, gives his weekly opinionated and hard hitting review of the weekend’s footy.

With a week’s tipping to go in the Vietnam Swans Footy Tipping Comp, Kutch, like the Cats, had a slight stumble. Chris and Sridhar edge closer but need to take risks to make up two games.

Is there such a thing as an honorable loss? They think so down at the Cattery after two of their best midfielders withdrew before the game. How lucky are Port? A winning goal with just three seconds left on the clock after last week stealing a match against the Hawks by kicking 2 goals in the last minute.

I’m definitely a footy junkie and that means I actually enjoy most of the after match radio chat. When Everywhere Eddie McGuire was asked about the imminent tribunal appearance of “ROCCA!!” he followed up his initial comment, “I can’t comment on imminent tribunal appearances” with ”It was not even a strong enough blow to part the Swans player’s hair”. That’s some no comment! For what it’s worth, my verdict is he’ll get a week. And a costly week it could be with the Carringbush still in the hunt for a prized top four finish.

Still on Collingwood. Whilst he only had a moderate 14 possessions, the skipper’s return had an immediate impact making all his younger teammates ‘walk tall’. Bucks has had 50 weeks paid leave. That’s more than a school teacher! Whilst his possessions in his comeback match were below average the Swans were chasing black and white feathers right from the first bounce when Buckley swooped, delivered lace out to Thomas who goaled. After that The Swans never looked likely.

My travel agent tells me The Sydney Swans have already booked their End of Season trip directly after week one of the finals.

I’ve just had it confirmed by a somewhat dodgy source that the AFL will pay people to attend the final home and away match for the season, the 5:10 pm match Melb v Carlton at the MCG. The Tanking Blues fielded their youngest side ever on Saturday whilst their opponents, Melbourne struggled to find 22 players fit enough to play against Freo. Could this be the AFL’s first ever nil all draw? Remember if Carlton lose they get the extra prized first pick, a reward for so few wins over the past few years. Enthralling!

Footy’s a funny game as are the characters in it! Yesterday the diehard fans paid tribute to an ex-ballet dancer and a Richmond plumber with James Hird’s and Kevin Sheedy’s Goodbye Game. Excuse me but this has been longer than the record-breaking consecutive send-off parties for ex-Hanoi Swans President Dave Kainey. Seriously though, even though I generally hate all things Essendon, these two deserved this send-off in front of almost 90 000 spectators. Then there was The Real Man’s Man, Longest Playing Shinboner ever, Archie, Just Awesome.  

The Haweksome performance yesterday against the Doggies was only soured by the goalkicking of the tall, lean Hawk they call Bunny Love. He scored a goal in the first quarter the hard way, all in behinds, Yep that’s right, he kicked six individual points. He ended the day with 2 goals 10! The good news is the Hawks win still allows some chance of it being an all Victorian Grand Finale.

The race for the final eighth spot should be known by Friday night. If Adelaide defeat Collingwood the eight contenders are decided. If they lose it gives the Saints a great chance if they can get over a resurgent Richmond. If the abovementioned games fall their way, Brisbane is the only other chance.

Shifting focus to the Hanoi frontline, Daniel Lucardie’s debut appearance at training was most impressive! Generally he’s a quiet type, but when the ball was in his zone he became as loud as ex-Swan The Pumpa! Danny has a footy brain, all the game skills and can roost the Sherrin outta sight! Has there ever been a more impressive debut?

Gus was nowhere to be seen despite being in town, nor was the attractive, female ground manager. Draw your own conclusions there.  And speaking of the Pumpa leads me to this week’s scoop. Pssssssstttt. I hear he will soon return to his old haunts in Hanoi.